Tags
curves, Dove, eat, eating disorder, food, happiness, Julienne Moore, life, Marion Cotillard, models, philosophy
Once in a while I’m done with something. It’s the moment people in my environment better watch out, because the pugnacious woman in me woke up. It’s the time that I have more energy than I usual have and I need less sleep. My eyes are full of passion and my heart is burning. The past month this pugnacious woman in me woke up because of my irratations about our obsession about weight and being thin. So today I hope you will join the forces and help me in my fight against being thin in an unhealthy way. So let’s celebrate our female curves, take a mug of hot chocolate with whipped cream on top and put that fork in your cheesecake! Because today we celebrate our curves!
As you probably already read in my previous articles, I was and am fighting against an eating disorder. It actually did not start with a desperate longing for being thin, because I already was. For me it started with my life being a mess. I found my control in eating. At that point eating was the only thing I could manage. I could decide how much I ate, how late I ate and what I ate. I decided I wanted to eat healthier. So I started to eat healthier. Then I wanted to eat on regular times. So that’s what I did. But after a while the situation was getting out of hand. When I was hungry and my next eating moment was two hours away, I told myself I had to waite these two hours before eating. And besides a strict eating-moment regime, I found myself being more and more anxious about calories and carbs. In my search for healthier food, I found a lot of information about calories and carbs. I was absolutely convinced I had to eat less carbs and after a few months at dinner I was only eating vegetables.. Carbs were not allowed in my kitchen anymore..
When I had dinner with a friend, I was already nervous hours before they would come. I always tried to eat at my place, so I could decide what to eat and if that wasn’t working, I tried eating only vegetables. I stopped drinking wine, I stopped drinking hot chocolate (something I always liked so much) and I even stopped eating bread.
But a few months later, I woke up at one morning, and saw I was surrounded by hair. It was absolutely everywhere. I thought it was the changing weather or my hormons, so I forgot about it. Untill a few weeks later I washed my hair and I pulled whole strings of hair out of my head. I was shocked and called my mom in total panic. I went to the doctor, but he said it was nothing. But I was so scared. My house was covered with hairs, they were literally everywhere and every time I washed my hair, I lost almost two hands full.. So it didn’t took me long before I discovered a few places on my head that were almost bald. And even my menstruation stopped that month…
And so it went on and on. I went to the dermatologist and even to a special hospital for hair loss. And finally, after months of denying, I recognized I was dealing with an eating disorder. The first week after telling people, were very hard. I felt like I was an idiot, mentally ill and a total pariah. But everyone in my environment was so sweet to me and told me I was extremely strong and I had so much to reach for. So I made my decision to fight it and so I did. Today I already gained 3 kilogram, my hair loss isn’t that extreme anymore and I’m having periods again.
But still, my fight isn’t over yet. Besides the fact that I have to gain another 2,5 kilogram, I also want people to see how unhealthy being thin can be and how much damage you can do to your body.
And yes, I like fashion. I think most of the models are gorgious, but I also think a lot of them are extremely thin. And well, they can be because it’s their bodytype, but I hope all women realize that being thin isn’t always healthy. It’s not healthy to starve yourself. It’s not healthy to loose half of your hair and it’s not healthy if your menstruation stops. Think about the negative side effect you defenitely will experience when you try to be thin in an unhealthy way.
And besides that, love who you are. You are a woman. You are born to give birth, you need fat to have a child. You need fat to protect your body from attacks, cold and stress. Fat is so extremely important! And no it’s not about being fat, it’s about being healthy! So please women, worship that little fat on your hips, that lovely cheeks and those beautiful legs and tummy’s. Because having a little fat on your bones is making you so much more powerfull and resilient than being too thin.
If was difficult for me to tell you my story, but I hope you will learn from it. Let today be all about celebrating your healthy curves. So go make yourself that pasta with extra cheese tonight and eat a dessert afterwards or maybe two. And if you ask yourself why you deserve it? Well, you deserve it because you are a powerfull, hardworking woman. You just deserve it because you are beautiful!
Gorgeous, slim, but healty women
rhodaw said:
thank you for your sweet comment on my blog! i really love your blog and advice especially on fitness (i am such a health nut), maybe we can follow each other? (:
http://www.styleandshades.blogspot.com
fashionforlunch said:
Beautiful dresses!!!
thehautecookie said:
love these women, and love the dove ad! xO!
http://www.thehautecookie.com
fiammisday said:
They are all amazing!!!
Camila Faria said:
You’re so brave to share your story with us! I hope you stay healthy and happy!
Dip It Black said:
Ah thank you so much!
I hope it too :).
Enjoy your evening :)
X
food4thoughtnyc said:
LOVE LOVE!! I’m joining the fight with you! Curvy women stand up!! Btw- I think Julianne Moore and Marion Cotillard are two of the most beautiful women in the world. :-)
Dip It Black said:
Ah I really appreciate that! Yes, they are so beautiful! And they are so talented too!
Thanks for your lovely comment!
X
Francesca said:
this is a very beautiful post :-)))
kisses!!!
Dip It Black said:
Ah thank you so much!
Have a lovely evening :)
x
Estilo Hedónico said:
Amazing post!!!!!!
Would you like to follow each other?!! :)
http://estilohedonico.blogspot.pt/
xoxo
Fashion Fools said:
One of my best friends struggled with an eating disorder as well, so I can understand how hard it must be for you to tell this story. Talking about it and recognising it is a big step in the right direction. Accept the good and the bad days, and just keep going. I hope you’ll find and keep a healthy balance and I wish you all the best.
XxX A.
Dip It Black said:
Yes it is quite hard, but it’s actually going really great the last weeks. I set a few goals, my dreams, I wanna reach and these are almost forcing me to do the best I can with eating. I hope your friend is doing well and I hope you will give her all the support she need, because we’re often called ‘stupid’, but what we actually need is love and confident, and I found it with my friends and family :).
Thanks for your lovely comment!
I really appreciate it!
X
Wish your friend all the best!
And if she need some support, she can always contact me.
Jennifer said:
Thanks for your comment!
i love your blog, very well done!
http://summermarlowe.blogspot.fr/
Dip It Black said:
Thank you so much!
X
Cravingforbarneys said:
Thank you for sharing your storupy! You are so brave! As you now I love reading your blog! You write really really good!
Dip It Black said:
Ah thank you so much sweetie!
This reaction is really doing me good!
And you know I love your blog too :)
Big kiss!
lubyangelsbeautify said:
A great post, I admire you being brave enough to talk about this x
Dip It Black said:
Ah thank you so much!
I really appreciate it :)
X
ilsieom said:
As always a great post!! Nominated you for the Liebster Award read more about it here: http://adventuresinwonderburg.com/2012/10/11/i-was-nominated-for-the-liebster-award/
Dip It Black said:
Ah I feel so honoured!!
I go look at it immediately!
Thank you so much :)
Big kiss!
Leonor said:
really great post dear!! thank you so much dear! I am now following you too on bloglovin!!:) keep in touch!
Leonor
thesparklinglemon.blogspot.com
Dip It Black said:
Ah thank you so much! That’s so sweet!
We will :)
X
FASHION IMPERATIVE said:
Nice post, Emma and these celebs are really beautiful healty woman.
A.
FASHION IMPERATIVE FI FB
Dip It Black said:
Thank you!
X
tulleandtrinkets said:
” You need fat to protect your body from attacks, cold and stress. Fat is so extremely important! And no it’s not about being fat, it’s about being healthy!” — So well said!
Thank you for sharing your story!
:) Sarah
Dip It Black said:
Ah thank you so much!
If only one person feels a little better by me telling my story, it was worth it!
X
Enjoy your friday!
francesca r said:
I am joining you in this celebration!
Don’t Call Me Fashion Blogger
Facebook
Bloglovin’
Dip It Black said:
I’m so happy with that!
X
Scribbler said:
Lovely post and I am grateful that you told your story. Your courage is amazing and I wish you happiness and wellness. I also feel strongly about your plight! Curves are natural to some women and no one should feel bad about them!
Adieu, scribbler
Dip It Black said:
Ah thank you so much! Your comments are always so sweet!
I feel really honoured with your words :)
X
Have a beautiful day!
Scribbler said:
As always, my pleasure and I hope your day is grand!
Adieu, scribbler
mili said:
it must have taken a lot of strength to share this story, thank you so much for the inspiration!
xx mili
callmemaeby.blogspot.com/
Dip It Black said:
Thank you so much!
Have a lovely day!
X
Pingback: International Day of the Girl « thescribblerarchive
Dip It Black said:
Yes I saw this right after I wrote this article! Such a good initiative!
X
Closet Fashionista said:
I agree, it’s time for people to stop thinking about weight when they think about beauty. As long as you are healthy you are beautiful :)
I’m so glad you are getting over your eating issues. I have eating problems too, but it’s not because I restrict myself…it’s because I’m a picky eater. I eat too much junk food and not enough healthy food…I need to find a happy medium but I just never have the motivation
http://www.closet-fashionista.com/
Dip It Black said:
That first sentence is so true! It’s about being healthy, a healthy weight is important, not a low weight.
I can see your problem, what motivates me is thinking about all the things that I wanna do. I have to be healthy, and I have to have enough energy to do them and to follow my dreams. Maybe this can help you too?
Thanks for your honest comment!
X
Rebecca said:
Amazing post! I totally agree women should celebrate their curves!
Rebecca
http://www.winnipegstyle.ca
Dip It Black said:
Ah thanks for your comment!
Have a lovely day!
X
Tatiana said:
Thanks for sweet comment, honey!!!
Great post! I love yellow dress;-)
And very cute blog!
I`m your follower now (bloglovin`).
And I`ll be SOO happy, if you follow me too:-)
Tatiana
http://www.bonnie23blog.blogspot.com/
Dip It Black said:
You are so welcome!
Thanks for the comment and compliments!
I would love to follow each other!
You have a very interesting look on fashion!
X
Borjana said:
Amazing!Great post,honey!;)
xx
B.
http://www.beeswonderland.com/
Dip It Black said:
Thank you so much Borjana!
Enjoy your day!
Almost weekend :)
X
summerteifi said:
Amazing post. And to read of your story was just so inspiring and heart warming. You write beautifully. I really connected with each word, and the waking up to the denial of it is a really amazing thing to acknowledge and share. It takes that moment in you to realise it yourself, no matter how many people tell you. But to then share and get on the path to recover is something that takes heaps of courage and so well done for doing so. I never really did that. I battled it alone and it shifted from bulimia, to anorexia, to then bulimia that softened with time but always has been there. And to read of the support shown when you talked about it is heart warming. So thank you. And I hope now with this time of healing, I now know it is safe and okay to share about it. I think sometimes you don’t get to this point of knowing, until you are slightly past the worst bit. And other times you get to a point when you are in the middle of the deepest bit of the trouble, and you have to ask for help because you don’t have anywhere else to go.
Anyway, I just wanted you to know you are an inspiration. Keep writing. Keep shining. X
Dip It Black said:
Ah. What a heartwarming comment!
I don’t see it as a brave thing myself. I just hope people realize that it’s a serious disease and that it breaks so much things down in your life. And I want people to believe in theirselves. Because you can fight it!
And I recognize what you say about that ‘softening of anorexia and bulimia’. That’s the most dangerous period I think. If I now look back, I think I always had eating problems in my life, but when I was going through a hard time, it appears more visible and got worse. It’s something I guess you have to keep in mind your whole life. But it’s also giving you a lot. Not the disease, but the battle, the fight and the insights. I hope you feel good today and all the other days and that this horrible disease won’t stand in the way of you reaching for the sky!
And thank you so much for your compliment, you have no idea how much I appreciate them!
Love and kisses!
And I hope we’ll meet soon in Paris hihi ;)
Sanah said:
You’re really brave and it takes a lot of guts to talk about something so personal. I admire your courage.
I wish you all the best for the future and I hope you win this battle. :)
With warm regards
Sanah
Dip It Black said:
What a sweet comment!
I’m sure I will win the battle :)
I’m a real dreamer and want to follow them
and I am only able to follow them if I overcome this!
But thank you so much for your heart warming words and I really enjoyed reading your post :).
X
anyone4curryandotherthings said:
Claudia, I only read your story here today and my heart goes out to you.For somebody so young, I think you are very courageous, wise and hopefully now a believer – in yourself!!! Look what you have achived in only 2 month! Sheer hard work, determination and the will to make what you touch a success; and you have such a nice gentle way to do all this in a world (fashion, etc.) which is full of backstabbing, bitchiness at times. your blog comes across like a shining light. I am a stranger to you, but I plead with you nevertheless -do not give up, Claudia. You must have realised you are certainly not alone and there are plenty of people out there now who want you to succeed in everything you touch, your health, your life, your career. Good Luck, my Dear and a big hug through cyberspace. Ciao Carina